Hello my name is Betrand and I desperately need your help. I’m on the hunt for a prime and most exquisite corpse to add to my decade long collection. I already have a few interesting and rare finds in my collection but not quite the exquisite corpse I am searching for. I just want to add a disclaimer that I do not use or touch any said corpses! I just like to bask in their purely aesthetic glory. So now that’s out of the way, a bit about myself. I’m a deeply restless soul, always looking for perfection in the lifeless form but never quite feeling I have traversed the deathly horizon into the realm of true beauty and perfection. It isn’t the occasional awkwardly situated mole or the odd missing eye which prevents me from reaching this realm. If I’m honest I’m not entirely sure what it is that is always, ALWAYS just missing :(.

So I thought I’d share my recent ideas process. I’ve really tried to consider how I could mix things up a bit more. I keep digging the same graves, literally. Below is a brainstorming session of the other night, which I am using to further my research and develop on ideas. I’m not sure how easy it is to read. I tend to get into a manic state of flow when focused on such subjects! so I will comment below on each section with my finds and at the end of this post I will reveal my current exquisite corpse experiment. Please contact me to if you have any ideas to add! [buzybodybetrand@outlook.com]

 

1. How about a holiday? Where could I look abroad for new specimens?

Perhaps TripAdvisor, google or top 10 lists could be of use here…

Possible key questions:

1.Top 10 weirdest graveyards

2.Where can I get fresh, dead human specimens for my…research project?

I am astonished at the current available graveyards on offer in the present so I thought I’d share my top finds 🙂 irrelevant of their sadly, long distances and ignorant of the difficult logistics in acquiring specimens.

The mysterious hanging coffins of China

These over 1000 year old specimens have been attached to the side of cliffs in places such as China, Indonesia and China. They were a kind of ancient funeral custom for some groups, particularly the Bo people of southern China. Experts believe that they thought the gods would be able to reach them more easily suspended on a rock face. So far interesting but not very promising for my purposes. However there is some hope…

According to Cui Chen, curator of the Yibin Museum, hanging coffins come in three types.

1. Some are cantilevered out on wooden stakes. (Not sure what the hell that means. I hope it means impaled on sticks of wood out in the open.)

2. Some are placed in caves. Prime.

3. Others sit on projections in the rock. 🙁

Possible location: All the three forms can be found in Gongxian where most of China’s hanging coffins are located.

Furthermore, they occasionally fall off the rock.

A Survey reports from the early 1990s show Gongxian County having a total of 280 hanging coffins. HOWEVER in the past 10 years or so nearly 20 have fallen. The coffins were hung at least 10 meters above the ground with the highest ones reaching 130 meters. Therefore, If they don’t drop, I don’t find their cavey lairs or ‘cantilevered out on wooden stakes’ doesn’t mean on sticks around the ground for deco, then 10 meters may certainly be a feasible climb.

 Chiesa dei Morti (Church of the Dead)

Fine specimens, top thing to do in Urbania and a TripAdvisor certificate of excellence, what a prime holiday! According to TripAdvisor reviews, visitors are guided around the display of the 18 mummies and told their macabre tales! I’m not certain of how secure the glass is but I think I should treat this as extracurricular activity. I’m not sure about the ethics of stealing an ancient specimen from the main attraction of Urbania, maybe let them have something. Although if I had to choose, I think this smile is particularly sublime.

Neptune Memorial Reef

Incredibly misleading. Hardly a graveyard. There are no actual bodies kept in this underwater memorial site. The ashes of specimens are mixed with cement to help further construct their man-made version of the fictitious Atlantis. Very disappointed. May head to one of my standard locations tonight, to make myself feel a bit better.

P.S In case you are an enthusiast, just a little plug in/top tip. Brookwood cemetery is a prime location, it is the most extensive collection in the UK, spreading across 500 glorious acres and holding 235,000 specimens. It is located in Surrey, if you are a fairly local reader I’ve included a helpful screenshot, its fairly close to the West Hill Golf Club. For a particularly pleasant evening, I quite like to have a few rounds of golf and then pop over for the real highlight event.

 

2. Where can I get fresh, dead human specimens for my…research project?

On the problem of can I acquire human bodies for my research project. I just found a highly informative page directing me to such a process, which has some promises, apart from I will have to consider how I could pass the anatomy bequest program, as my university times are long gone for certain reasons… that I will not divulge at this point. If there is anyone out there who happens to be in this field of research and shares the same vision as me, please get in touch! at [buzybodybetrand@outlook.com]

Absolutely excellent. Even provides contact details  for the Anatomy Bequest Program: (ABP) at bequest@umn.eduor 612-625-1111 to procure a deceased human body, or body part. I will immediately send an email tonight, it could happen by luck that whoever receives the email has the same vision!

If this email fails to get the response I am hoping for, perhaps I could purge a research corpse farm? how secure are they? According to HowStuffWorks: ‘there’s no common set of standards or guidelines that body farms adhere to, other than safety, security and privacy.‘ Top three words I don’t like to hear, although looking at google images some look pretty prime, they’ve even left the gate open.

3. Maybe I need to innovate on my decorative methods?

Research keywords:

Corpse decorative methods

Ancient dead people outfits

Dead people, costumes, rituals

Creative embalming

Sadly, these search terms proved mostly fruitless. I could not acquire the catalog of corpse outfits I was hoping to purvey. Most of websites tend to focus on the rituals and the burial traditions, rather than their attire.

‘Over my dead body’ clothing range

However, I did find a contemporary fashion website called Lyst which offers an ‘Over my dead body’ range of clothing. They produce boutique outfits, based on consumer research, especially for when people meet their demise. Shoppers can even opt for a ‘try before you die’ option!

Overall I’m not particularly impressed with the outfits on offer or their price tags. I think I will opt for my usual DIY attitude to specimen decoration. For my own personal taste, I thought the men’s section was, as usual, inadequate. I did particularly like the folk slim-fit plaid shirt and I fancy that I may be able to pull off the yankees strapback cap but sadly these were both sold out.

 

Creative embalming

Again this search term didn’t really acquire the kind of hits I was hoping for. It seems people still hold the dignity of the dead too close to heart :/. Luckily, this dignity does not cover animals so here I found some spectacular examples for inspiration.

This work made me think that perhaps I should mix things up a bit. Creative combinations of corpse, man-made material, machine, animal, barbie etc.

My queen. Although I think I could definitely improve on her head and limbs.

Taxidermy squirrel violence on the ice hockey pitch. What an inspirational tableau of death.

4. Sweet, heavenly convergence of ideas

Feeling incredible and uncontrollably inspired right now. I am certain there is a masterpiece in the works. I feel enlightened and excited. Not only have I just booked a well needed trip to Urbania; to see 18 ancient corpses and a trip to China; to explore ancient caves and cliffs for specimens. I have come to a realization that I have limited myself by thinking in terms of the creative opportunities of decorating A corpse. A singular, ordinary corpse. Not polluted or converged with other forms, just a plain, old, boring corpse. But now I see I could combine the human form with parts of the alien ‘others’ and I do not need to limit my art work to a singular exquisite corpse. Perhaps, the collection of several in a dramatic tableau, would be truly exquisite. Here I have a fantastical convergence of ideas, as shown on my brainstorm chart and I have the first blueprints to truly exquisite corpses. I here insert a close up of my initial sketch for your considerations. My next step will be to create a short animated depiction.

[WORKING TITLE]?

OUTLINE

Corpse 1, on the left of the diagram, will be created in a similar fashion to the raccoon like creature with the baby face, except it will be my recently deceased cat, with a baby face.

Corpse 2, on the far side, will be a recent, fresh specimen from Brookwood cemetery. As of yet I am unsure of the attire because I was not particularly inspired by the ‘over my dead body’ clothing range so for now I might just put traditional 19th century costume on it. This corpse will have a robot arm which lifts the shrunken head of corpse 3 up and down, teasing the cat baby abomination below.

Corpse 3, as I said, is a shrunken head. Not sure what kind of head I will go for. I’d like to have a traditional one, like the night driver from Harry Potter but I’m not sure if they sell them online…after a spot of research, yes it is possible! I can contact G. Howard McGinty at Info@RealShrunkenHeads.com! In case you have a particular interest, this is his website.

Additionally, corpse 2 will be cosmetically modified to look Mona Lisa. There will be my beautiful singing voice travelling through her hollow body singing the words ‘panis’ and ‘angelicus.’ (Latin for bread of angels or heavenly bread). Their robot arm will drop as the word ‘panis’ is sung and rise as the word ‘angelicus’ is sung so that the cat baby abomination below will be perpetually tormented by a shrunken head (they for some reason want to devour…well who knows what cat babies like to snack on)which is in the control of robot Mona Lisa, in Victorian wear, singing panis angelicus.

I have a gut feeling this still wont quite be exquisite but as I said, its just another one of my hopeful experiments. For this project, I’d like some suggestions on mona lisa’s attire and perhaps a suitable title, I’m having difficulty with thinking of what could really encapsulate the beauty of this piece. Of course, I would be delighted to learn about your own ideal visions of what would be an exquisite corpse.

 

Any suggestions?

(buzybodybetrand@outlook.com)

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